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Weekend reading: How are you setting your table?

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What caught my eye this week.

I was stood up last night. Well, my dinner date didn’t make it. There were reasons. But my Google Alert for the Zombie Apocalypse didn’t trigger, so no excuses.

(Obviously in practice I’ve bumbled out Hugh Grant-esque assurances that I understand and it’s no problem and really another time, because I do and it isn’t and maybe. But Hugh doesn’t have to write dramatic blog openers.)

Anyway, as I sat enjoying my slow-cooked Mallorcan lamb for two by myself, I found myself admiring my pretty dining table, the natural grain of the wood, the way it’s lit by the fancy pendants above.

Quite the scene, especially if your tastes run to Edward Hopper.

Two times table

It isn’t a particularly expensive table – it was one of my carefully sniped online bargains secured during my materialism mania last year.

One of the good things about dithering for decades before finally buying your own place though is you’ve got a bit more cash spare to indulge William Morris’ famous dictat:

Have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful, or believe to be beautiful.

(Present company excepted, of course.)

But there were some unfortunate aspects to my delaying, too.

Specifically: Life moved on.

Much as I like my table, it doesn’t extend. I thought this would be a big deal when I bought it, and agonized as it only really fits six people comfortably. But the truth is I’ve only overflowed off the table twice since moving in.

There were periods – years ago now – when I’d have 8-12 people over for some sort of food and drink gathering every month or so. Even more often when I was in a relationship. But most of my old friends long ago went off to have kids in the provinces (i.e. beyond Zone 6). Or they’ve left the country altogether.

And while I pounce on young people like Keifer Sutherland in The Lost Boys – yes, an ancient reference, chosen for effect – much of the cast of Series Two: The Didactic Years has moved on, too.

So it’s mostly just a couple having dinner with me on my table these days, or perhaps one or two older and similarly loner-ish diehard chums, or maybe a rare married London friend returning from that strange confinement of being responsible for children under five, still nervously watching her six-year old threaten to topple my tree fern out in the garden even as she starts to remember how to rant about politics and rave about mini-breaks again like the old days.

Rentaghost

Does it matter that I had most of my big social gatherings in rented places shared with friends – where many times the conversation turned to when was I finally going to buy somewhere of my own – and that now I do own somewhere, most nights I potter around it alone like someone from a Philip Larkin poem?

No no, don’t be silly. Time and place and all that.

Besides, I remember Douglas Coupland saying something in Generation X about how you lose your ability to make new friends the day you buy your first piece of non-disposable (/IKEA) furniture, so maybe my extended property serfdom garnered me a wider social circle than my scary Myers-Briggs statistics should warrant.

On the other hand, it’d have been nice to have had my own place, and all my own bits and bobs, and to have enjoyed then the theater of playing the host in my own curated home. I saw friends relish it, and thought I would, too.

None of this may be striking a chord with you, but something similar will. Because these are the sort of trade-offs we make all the time when we save and invest for the future.

Of course you try to do the best with today in the meantime. You tell yourself it doesn’t matter that you’re not going abroad with your friends this summer. Press-ups and a pair of dumbbells are just as good as their gym membership. You can live like a billionaire on a supersavers’ budget.

But you can’t have it all, not in one lifetime. You can’t go back, travel like you could, run like you could, be as silly as you could. You might say you can, but you know you can’t. You can’t get your 20s back, and those glorious reckless days of being young.

Now I happen to believe that being young is such a natural state of grace that you really are best off saving your money for when you’re not young anymore. But that doesn’t change the mathematics of time’s arrow, and the consequences.

I often think about that scene in The Godfather, when Michael Corleone has a flashback to the raucous family table from years before he became a cold-blooded mafioso kingpin. Somewhere on the way to the latter, the former died. Perhaps he killed it, or perhaps it was going to die anyway.

There was a moment in my very early 30s when I’d decided not to buy a flat (too expensive) but I hadn’t yet fully caught the investing mania that went on to define me (too nervous). For a while I considered using the deposit I’d saved on moving to the mountains, or traveling. There was even a silly five-minutes when fed up with chasing property prices I considered throwing my frugal persona to the wind and buying an open-topped sports car. (Especially silly considering I don’t have a driving license.)

What I did instead was learn to invest, get addicted to it, put all my house savings into the market, even started a website about it – and life went on regardless of my previous plans.

We shape our buildings, and afterwards they shape us
– Winston Churchill

Tomorrow, tomorrow, I love you, tomorrow

For more on this theme, check out this short new podcast on Abnormal Returns. It’s about balancing your today with what the guest Jeremy Walter calls ‘Tomorrowland’. I also touched on it in Buffett’s Folly if you want more.

This post sounds a bit maudlin, reading it back, but that’s just the wine talking. (And maybe the empty place at the table. Tiny violins. Don’t worry, this site is unknown to her. Our secret!)

I had my reasons for not buying a property sooner. My friends would have had kids and left anyway. I’ve got options today from the delay that I’m not sure I’d trade for a hodgepodge of fading memories.

So no regrets. Just a little shiver of reality.

From Monevator

Don’t be scared by a share split – Monevator

From the archive-ator: Staycation holidays – Monevator

News

Note: Some links are Google search results – in PC/desktop view you can click to read the piece without being a paid subscriber. Try privacy/incognito mode to avoid cookies. Consider subscribing if you read them a lot!1

Sterling takes a pounding [Search result]FT

Adding more tariffs on Chinese goods could torpedo the US economy. Why is Trump doing it? – Slate

Late Rooms and Super Break collapse hits holidaymakers – Guardian

Suspended Woodford fund breaches unquoted limit after Guernsey stocks de-list – CityWire

Young Britons believe dream of owning home is over, survey says – Guardian

Sequencing risk and portfolio retirement rates – Fat-tailed and Happy

Products and services

The Lifetime ISA: Three ways to invest [Search result]FT

How to sell only part of a paper-based shareholding – ThisIsMoney

Revolut launches commission-free share trading in US [Europe/UK to follow]Prolific London

Virgin launches 15-year fixed-rate mortgage charging 2.55% – ThisIsMoney

Ratesetter will pay you £100 [and me a cash bonus] if you invest £1,000 for a year Ratesetter

How to claim PPI compensation (for free!) before the 29th August deadline – MoneySavingExpert

US lawmakers are realizing they can’t ban Bitcoin – Forbes

Homes for sale in gatehouses [Gallery]Guardian

Comment and opinion

Five portfolio lessons from target-date funds [US but relevant]Morningstar

Woodford exposes flawed cog in the machine [On Authorised Corporate Directors, search result]FT

Investing a million from the sale of a business – A Wealth of Common Sense

Retirement – Indeedably

Richard Thaler: “If you want people to do something, make it easy” [Search result]FT

Just 1.3% of companies account for all the market gains of past three decades – Bloomberg

Wade Pfau makes the case for (simple) annuities over bonds in retirement – Yahoo

Best and worst value experiences in spending money – Valididea

A guide to investing money for children [PDF]EQ Investors

Simon Lambert: High stamp duty is putting people off moving home – ThisIsMoney

The [contentious] case against traditional rebalancing strategies – Mark Hulbert

Angel investing: 10 tips for a virgin – Fire V London

Offered options by a start-up? Here’s a guide to valuing them – Matt Cooper via Medium

Alternative fee structures to realign the active fund management business – Clearing the Fog

What is quality investing? [PDF]Andrew Latto

Brexit

Government finds the magic money tree and shakes out £2.1bn extra for no-deal Brexit – BBC

“We can find no evidence that Dominic Raab warned of a no-deal Brexit”Channel 4 / FactCheck

UK voters only began Googling no-deal explanations in mid-2018 [Graphic] – Mike Butcher via Twitter

“No room” for excess meat in a no-deal Brexit – BBC

Edinburgh festival performers refuse to be paid in sterling [Search result]FT

Tory rebels threaten Boris Johnson as majority cut to one – Guardian

The Unite to Remain Alliance that won Brecon can take down a no-deal Brexit – Julian Dunkerton

Kindle book bargains

Misbehaving: The Making of Behavioural Economics by Richard Thaler – £1.99 on Kindle

The Smartest Guys in the Room: The Amazing Rise and Scandalous Fall of Enron by Bethany McLean – £1.99 on Kindle

The Four: The hidden DNA of Amazon, Apple, Facebook and Google by Scott Galloway – £0.99 on Kindle

The Miracle Morning: The 6 Habits that Will Transform your Life before 8AM by Hal Elrod – £0.99 on Kindle

Off our beat

Hanging out is essential to our health – Raptitude

Britain isn’t even in the top 10 of the world’s most innovative economies [Graphic]Visual Capitalist

Walking is a superpower that makes us happier and healthier – Guardian

Brazil sacks top scientist who revealed extent of Amazon deforestation – Guardian

A New York Times‘-backed project using Bitcoin to authenticate/fight ‘deep fake’ images – New Provenance Project

“There can be only one” [Short video] – via Twitter

And finally…

“Ownership is not limited to material things. It can also apply to points of view. Once we take ownership of an idea — whether it’s about politics or sports — what do we do? We love it perhaps more than we should. We prize it more than it is worth. And most frequently, we have trouble letting go of it because we can’t stand the idea of its loss.”
– Dan Ariely, Predictably Irrational

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  1. Note some articles can only be accessed through the search results if you’re using PC/desktop view (from mobile/tablet view they bring up the firewall/subscription page). To circumvent, switch your mobile browser to use the desktop view. On Chrome for Android: press the menu button followed by “Request Desktop Site”. []
{ 22 comments… add one }
  • 1 Dorf August 3, 2019, 6:49 am

    I liked your melancholic opening, it matches my mood on this gray weekend morning. In many ways middle-life is more interesting than the glorious potential of youth, because you’ve discarded a few cards in your hand and have to play on what’s left. Mixed metaphor. Off to read your links. I for one benefit from the choices you made a decade ago 😉

  • 2 Faith A. August 3, 2019, 8:59 am

    Lost Boys, Rentaghost and Coupland references in a single post? I’m beginning to think we must be an identical vintage. Spooky.

  • 3 Chris August 3, 2019, 9:22 am

    Myers Briggs and slow cooked lamb – only at Monevator.

    And so INFJ…

    Thanks as ever.

  • 4 Norfolk August 3, 2019, 9:45 am

    Re: the no-show leading to maudlin navel-gazing over life decisions already made and how to best avoid the discomfort? You can’t change the past, so regret is needless pain, you can get a more reliable partner though 🙂 (and/or have a hungry friend as a back up on speed-dial to keep you company while they scavenge the remains of the meal)

  • 5 Retirement Investing Today August 3, 2019, 9:52 am

    I’ve never heard that William Morris quote before. I like it! A lot. Having being a good consumer for many years I settled on only buying things that bring true value to my life. Useful and beautiful both fit that bill and describe what I’m trying to achieve but as usual in a far more elegant way. Thanks.

  • 6 Old Pro August 3, 2019, 10:01 am

    To Faith A and Chris… you missed a couple of others… Annie (the musical), the Godfather (film)…Four weddings and a Funeral… we could also add The Wonder Years… Philip Larkin… Nighthawks (great painting!!) … it’s not so much as Mallorcan stew as a bouillabaisse..! 🙂

    To The Monevator yes I’m still standing and of an age to enjoy such musings on my own life even more so… well to have them even more so… All the best (congratulations on your home purchase again!)

  • 7 Haphazard August 3, 2019, 11:31 am

    Thanks for another great set of links.
    On Brexit, I thought this piece in the Irish Times was interesting (and a bit daring): https://www.irishtimes.com/opinion/fintan-o-toole-ireland-can-stop-a-no-deal-brexit-here-s-how-1.3972121

    Also, for people interested in behavioural biases and manipulation, as well as the referendum. The Select Committee hearings from the “fake news” enquiry have some very interesting material. They take a long time to listen to – but then you can listen to the audio while doing household chores etc.:
    https://www.parliament.uk/business/committees/committees-a-z/commons-select/digital-culture-media-and-sport-committee/inquiries/parliament-2017/fake-news-17-19/publications/

  • 8 MrOptimistic August 3, 2019, 12:26 pm

    Ok, I’ll make the obvious comment. You have a tree fern!?
    Seen the price of those things ( and they tend to die on our cold wet clay in the ‘ North Bedfordshire Wolds’ – and whoever came up with that excruciating title for a slab of elevated clay is a tw*t of the first water).
    Having just retired, whatever that means these days, and got my ‘ older persons concessionary bus pass’, attended a funeral in 100F heat of a relative my age after a short but ghastly illness (PML), reckon you have to figure out what is really valuable to you.
    People generally get on my nerves so I am happy left to my own devices. Others may need a large social circle. Once you have enough money then you have enough. If you can’t think of something you really want now, that you can’t currently justify or afford, what would you spend a future fortune on if you had it?

  • 9 Marco August 3, 2019, 4:59 pm

    “Edinburgh festival goers refuse to be paid in sterling” = reasonable chance the sterling bear is about to turn a corner.

    I remember similar comments in 2009/10 about the US dollar when £1 would buy $2

  • 10 The Investor August 3, 2019, 5:29 pm

    Ok, I’ll make the obvious comment. You have a tree fern!?

    Ha ha, fear not, this is still me we’re talking about. I have two (!) but I got them both in Homebase store liquidation for much less than half the price I’ve seen online. That said the larger one was still closer to £200 than £100 from memory, but it was *well* worth it.

    My flat is part of what London estate agents redundantly call a ‘new conversion’ (basically the shell of a period building that’s become trashed enough to justify ripped everything out and redoing it as if it were a new build inside the shell (so steel supports, underfloor heating, top-line insulation etc). As part of this I got floor to ceiling windows (really bi-fold doors) across the back of the house, which looks out onto a nicely hard-scaped but otherwise totally spartan back garden.

    The tree ferns added instant impact and pizzazz, visible from my bedroom, and together with getting several clematis going on the fences and added a bunch of showy bulbs (dahlias etc) they’ve allowed me to postpone sorting the garden properly for a couple of years.

    Yes, they’re *saving* me money! 😉

  • 11 The Borderer August 3, 2019, 9:49 pm

    @the Investor.
    Dahlias are tubers, not bulbs.

    If you really want to save money, dig them up in the autumn, cut back the stems, clean them up, and store them in trays of dry peat in a cool place. In March, start spraying them with a little tepid water 1x per day and they will start to sprout. When the shoots are 3-4 inches high, cut them off with a razor sharp knife and pot them in potting compost.
    Hey presto, 9 or 10 new dahlias from each tuber.

    Talk about compound interest!

  • 12 Rosie August 3, 2019, 9:55 pm

    I missed the Rentaghost ref! Where is it?

  • 13 The Investor August 4, 2019, 12:15 am

    @The Borderer — Ah, and I always thought your name was a geographic reference, not a gardening one. 😉

    Good tips, cheers. I tried leaving them in the ground last winter and covering with mulch but only one clump made it through. May well try digging up this year.

  • 14 L August 4, 2019, 9:54 am

    @ The Investor –

    Care to share your lamb recipe? 🙂

  • 15 ZXSpectrum48k August 4, 2019, 1:06 pm

    @Marco. You remember wrong. GBP/USD hasn’t been 2 since July 2008. By 2009 it was down at 1.40-1.50. I’d agree that GBP does look rather cheap on a 40-year lookback.

    Unfortunately, the population desires something that will make them poorer, so the market is happy to deliver that scenario. I find it odd that people will march or strike for a few percent payrise but seems nonchalant that the’ve taken a 20% paycut, measured in global terms, since the vote of 2016. Fortunately, my compensation is determined in USD, a bit like Jacob Rees-Mogg and others of his ilk.

  • 16 The Borderer August 4, 2019, 8:47 pm

    @ZX (15)

    Like you, and probably many others here, I too will benefit from the fall in the £.

    But like you, and probably many others here, I don’t actually want to benefit from a situation that impoverishes my fellow countrymen, so I would never vote for it.

    Unlike JRM and his ilk.

    What a world we have found ourselves in!

  • 17 Rick G August 4, 2019, 9:26 pm

    “Much as I like my table, it doesn’t extend.”
    That really made me think of Alan Partridge:
    “Yes! It’s an extender!”

    I really like the reflective and honest writing in this post. Thanks!

  • 18 The Investor August 4, 2019, 10:16 pm

    Re: The lamb, it’s not a complicated recipe to make but it is a time consuming one to work through the stages, and even more so to type. It’s a slow stew with lots of fruit/seeds (e.g. prunes, sultanas, almonds, pine nuts and more) and some interesting/speedy stages (e.g. a brandy de-glazing stage, and a sort of paste/binding stage with a honey/saffron/biscuit/almond addition towards the end). It’s from the greatest cookery book of all time: https://amzn.to/2YkKOoe

    Re: The pound versus the dollar, thinking GBP finally had its mojo back is one of the two things that has somewhat de-railed my active investing this year. (Not totally, but enough to put me far behind a global tracker and very unlikely to catch up calendar year. Of course that’s just arbitrary human time-keeping but still. Yaboosucks! In case anyone is mildly (foolishly) curious, the other thing was feeling I finally ought to sell down US tech/growth late Spring after its bounce back. About 15-25% too early. 🙁 )

    Thanks for all the comments and thoughts!

  • 19 Simon August 6, 2019, 7:28 am

    A New York Times‘-backed project using Bitcoin to authenticate/fight ‘deep fake’ images – New Provenance Project

    It’s blockchain not bitcoin. (yeah I know they are related)

  • 20 ermine August 6, 2019, 2:38 pm

    > thought this would be a big deal when I bought it, and agonized as it only really fits six people comfortably

    Garden furniture. Most big gatherings tend to be in the summer and suited to outdoor settings. Unless in rains, natch 😉

    Mind you, people do all sorts of odd things for edge cases. Like carrying spare rooms totally unused other than for people to visit. Heck, for the savings on the extra you get to spend on the house with an unused wing you could put them up in a five star hotel with taxis to and fro. And have an extra annual holiday, probably.

  • 21 FitandFunemployed August 7, 2019, 10:10 am

    [quote]In case anyone is mildly (foolishly) curious, the other thing was feeling I finally ought to sell down US tech/growth late Spring after its bounce back. About 15-25% too early. )[/quote]

    Oh, you tease. I came here for speculation about the economy, but stayed for the lovely melancholic writing (Murakami-esque, somehow). Still – please do tell what you are/were thinking?

  • 22 Learner August 17, 2019, 3:42 pm

    Cheers for the No BS Guide to valuing private companies by Matt Cooper. Both of the medium (100-500 emp) sized companies I’ve joined have granted options but being privately held, the actual value has been hard to define. Very helpful to know the parameters around it and the corresponding range of possible outcomes.

    Personally, I treat options as worthless until proven otherwise. Like being granted a lottery ticket with unknown payout or odds.

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